1. flavaflaaaaaaaav
2. havepatients
3. doctorjay
4. glamourshotgary
5. cosby
6. awkwardkneelean
7. 1972bicyclepolaroid
8. lookitmyballs
9. sexycowboy
10. kneeshelfoldguy
11. pimpdaddy
12. 35yearoldpromdate
Thursday, September 10, 2009
ohnohedidnt... post this picture!
Please draw a line to the photo that matches how I've labeled the photo on my computer:
1. flavaflaaaaaaaav
2. havepatients
3. doctorjay
4. glamourshotgary
5. cosby
6. awkwardkneelean
7. 1972bicyclepolaroid
8. lookitmyballs
9. sexycowboy
10. kneeshelfoldguy
11. pimpdaddy
12. 35yearoldpromdate
1. flavaflaaaaaaaav
2. havepatients
3. doctorjay
4. glamourshotgary
5. cosby
6. awkwardkneelean
7. 1972bicyclepolaroid
8. lookitmyballs
9. sexycowboy
10. kneeshelfoldguy
11. pimpdaddy
12. 35yearoldpromdate
Deleter! No Deleting!
We're back! My co-blogger and I have recovered from our party party Labor Day weekend drunkfest. If you haven't figured it out (or maybe we just haven't said), she and I share a living space. We convene in our swanky bachelorette pad (and send each other 'WTF?!' texts as events occur) to stay abreast and compare notes on men's online dating faux-pas.
Abreast. I just had to say it again.
So it had to happen eventually... The guy who deleted me ended up taking a liking to her in the most fun way. It turns out, yes, he must not have been 'that into me,' but also he is just what his namesake suggests... a deleter. Roommate has been deleted by him as well! Apparently, he likes a tidy inbox. I mean, who doesn't?
Tidy inbox. That sounds kind of dirty. In a well-groomed sort of way.
So anyway - my roommate - god love her - has more patience in her than I could ever hope to have. She gave Deleter her phone number. I know two things about our friend, Deleter. 1. He has severe ADD. And 2. He loves to send her text messages.
Abreast. I just had to say it again.
So it had to happen eventually... The guy who deleted me ended up taking a liking to her in the most fun way. It turns out, yes, he must not have been 'that into me,' but also he is just what his namesake suggests... a deleter. Roommate has been deleted by him as well! Apparently, he likes a tidy inbox. I mean, who doesn't?
Tidy inbox. That sounds kind of dirty. In a well-groomed sort of way.
So anyway - my roommate - god love her - has more patience in her than I could ever hope to have. She gave Deleter her phone number. I know two things about our friend, Deleter. 1. He has severe ADD. And 2. He loves to send her text messages.
"If we were married, would we sleep in separate beds?"
"What?"
"I just finished looking at videos of tornados. Have you ever been in one?"
"Do you like guys with facial hair?"
"No, not really.. maybe a little scruff"
"I buy frequent flier miles as a side job."
"What's your favorite band?"
"I don't know.. I have a lot."
"I haven't cut my finger nails in a while."
"So your team lost today, huh?"
"Yes, unfortunately."
"Do you have any idea how technically hot the sun is -like the temperature of the sun?"
Anyway, the textual relationship slowed significantly after he met us at a bar and asked if I'd contracted the jungle fever (because he saw us with a black friend). We have yet to confirm the use of crack-cocaine as his recreational drug of choice. Although his XXL Dodgers jersey on his M frame and frequent use of "Meow" suggests we may be on the right track.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Wearing your heart on your.....keyboard?
Let's be honest. Putting yourself on an online dating website can say different things about you.
It can say:
- I am really busy with 17 jobs and 32 kids and have no time to try to find another other outside of the 22 hours I am awake and constantly busy.
- I have no luck picking up the opposite (or same for that matter) sex because I get real nervous and break into hives and sweat like Richard Nixon during the Watergate press conference.
- I fell from the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down and prefer making people think I look like Chris Pine until I lure them into meeting and then the joke is on them
- I am really bored with life and need something to keep me from becoming a hermit
and so on and so forth
Any way you slice it, you really are putting yourself out there in what should be a pretty honest manner... opening yourself up to snap judgement that may or may not be in your favor. If that's not ok with you...probably don't sign up. Taking a chance at messaging someone is the same as walking up to them at the bar and offering to buy them a drink. They can either decline or accept. Same goes for emails. I can read them and reply or not. If I choose not to reply it's either because you wrote 2 words (see one sentence wonder post) and are uninteresting or I don't think there is any attraction. Call me a shallow, egomaniacal snob, but I doubt I am the first to want a physical attraction to someone I could potentially bare children with. Have you seen Carrot Top? Obviously that was not important in his parents' relationship and see what happens? So... if you write me and compliment me (u r pretty) don't get your manties in a tangle if I read and delete. Furthermore... if you email me and I read and don't respond immediately, please don't send a SWAT team after me and demand to know why I did not reply upon reading your carefully thought out 6 word email.
Case in point:
From: XXXXXXXXXX (View Profile)
Subject: hi Sent Date: 9/1/2009 10:22:49 AM
Your beautiful!!!
and then I get this 5 minutes later after he constantly refreshed his browser to see if I read it and when I did and did not reply he sent:
From: xxxxxxxx (View Profile)
Subject: Rude Sent Date: 9/1/2009 10:29:34 AM
well your welcome!!!!
Really, guy? I am rude? Maybe at the exact moment I read your email the publishers clearing house showed up at my front door and informed me that I won a bazillion dollars. Would you reply immediately? And since you were so quick to insult me, even if I was interested, not gonna reply back now. Way to go, Captin Impatient. Patience is a virtue, Jesus said so.
It can say:
- I am really busy with 17 jobs and 32 kids and have no time to try to find another other outside of the 22 hours I am awake and constantly busy.
- I have no luck picking up the opposite (or same for that matter) sex because I get real nervous and break into hives and sweat like Richard Nixon during the Watergate press conference.
- I fell from the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down and prefer making people think I look like Chris Pine until I lure them into meeting and then the joke is on them
- I am really bored with life and need something to keep me from becoming a hermit
and so on and so forth
Any way you slice it, you really are putting yourself out there in what should be a pretty honest manner... opening yourself up to snap judgement that may or may not be in your favor. If that's not ok with you...probably don't sign up. Taking a chance at messaging someone is the same as walking up to them at the bar and offering to buy them a drink. They can either decline or accept. Same goes for emails. I can read them and reply or not. If I choose not to reply it's either because you wrote 2 words (see one sentence wonder post) and are uninteresting or I don't think there is any attraction. Call me a shallow, egomaniacal snob, but I doubt I am the first to want a physical attraction to someone I could potentially bare children with. Have you seen Carrot Top? Obviously that was not important in his parents' relationship and see what happens? So... if you write me and compliment me (u r pretty) don't get your manties in a tangle if I read and delete. Furthermore... if you email me and I read and don't respond immediately, please don't send a SWAT team after me and demand to know why I did not reply upon reading your carefully thought out 6 word email.
Case in point:
From: XXXXXXXXXX (View Profile)
Subject: hi Sent Date: 9/1/2009 10:22:49 AM
Your beautiful!!!
and then I get this 5 minutes later after he constantly refreshed his browser to see if I read it and when I did and did not reply he sent:
From: xxxxxxxx (View Profile)
Subject: Rude Sent Date: 9/1/2009 10:29:34 AM
well your welcome!!!!
Really, guy? I am rude? Maybe at the exact moment I read your email the publishers clearing house showed up at my front door and informed me that I won a bazillion dollars. Would you reply immediately? And since you were so quick to insult me, even if I was interested, not gonna reply back now. Way to go, Captin Impatient. Patience is a virtue, Jesus said so.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Return of the Mack
Let's take a trip back in time. Waaaay way back to.... 2 days ago. Remember when I was Chuck Norris??? (Good times!) So I didn't respond to his copy/paste funtimes email. What's the use in leading these guys on... Well, he wrote me again that day after I didn't respond.
From: xxxxx123 (View Profile)
Subject: RE:RE:Hey Sent Date: 8/31/2009 11:44:08 AM
Come on you didn't think the Chuck Norris facts where funny?
From: hhhhhhhhhhhh (View Profile)
Subject: RE:RE:RE:Hey Sent Date: 8/31/2009 11:54:23 AM
it's not that they weren't funny... i've read them before and can go find them whenever i like on the 'net. you didn't really give me anything to respond to.
OK! Done! Schwoo! I think I handled that pretty well. He's still thinking about it 2 days later...
From: xxxxx123 (View Profile)
Subject: RE:RE:RE:RE:Hey Sent Date: 9/2/2009 9:18:29 AM
So what your saying is I need to elicit a response. I thought that would work they are funny. Didn't think you would have seen them allready. What is your favorite thing to do on the weekends? What is your real name Chuck?
Jxxxxxxx
I had a whole response typed up trying to help him out. Don't ask for any personal info. If she has stated her interests in her profile where information is willingly given, she probably does those things on the weekends. But I really can't stand to get ANOTHER email from him in which he is just.. lame. It's too sad.
From: xxxxx123 (View Profile)
Subject: RE:RE:Hey Sent Date: 8/31/2009 11:44:08 AM
Come on you didn't think the Chuck Norris facts where funny?
From: hhhhhhhhhhhh (View Profile)
Subject: RE:RE:RE:Hey Sent Date: 8/31/2009 11:54:23 AM
it's not that they weren't funny... i've read them before and can go find them whenever i like on the 'net. you didn't really give me anything to respond to.
OK! Done! Schwoo! I think I handled that pretty well. He's still thinking about it 2 days later...
From: xxxxx123 (View Profile)
Subject: RE:RE:RE:RE:Hey Sent Date: 9/2/2009 9:18:29 AM
So what your saying is I need to elicit a response. I thought that would work they are funny. Didn't think you would have seen them allready. What is your favorite thing to do on the weekends? What is your real name Chuck?
Jxxxxxxx
I had a whole response typed up trying to help him out. Don't ask for any personal info. If she has stated her interests in her profile where information is willingly given, she probably does those things on the weekends. But I really can't stand to get ANOTHER email from him in which he is just.. lame. It's too sad.
Can I Ask You a Personal Question?
In other words, pleeeeeeeease respond to me this time.
From: ignoreme (View Profile)
Subject: Hello Sent Date: 9/1/2009 3:37:51 PM
Hey how are you doing? Did you have a good weekend? Any big plans for the holiday weekend coming up?
I didn't respond... his picture was fine. I always check out the profile to see if there's something I'm missing.
Nope, nothing going on there. Plus, he's short. And he doesn't need to know what I'm doing for the weekend.
Something about the way I ignored the email made him wonder something very specific:
From: ichangedmyminddontignoreme (View Profile)
Subject: Hello Sent Date: 9/2/2009 7:30:14 AM
May i ask you a somewhat personal question?
Did I respond to this guy and forget? I'm pretty sure I didn't. But I'm sorta dying to know if he's going to be that guy and ask if the carpet matches the drapes. What else would he want to know that he needs to ask it that way? I mull it over and decide I'm irritated enough to need to know what he wants.
From: godwhatdoyouwantman (View Profile)
Subject: RE:Hello Sent Date: 9/2/2009 11:34:04 AM
if you really wanted to know, you would've just asked it already, right?
the real question is if i'll answer it.
From: yay!aresponse (View Profile)
Subject: RE:RE:Hello Sent Date: 9/2/2009 11:41:01 AM
LOL... do you ever enjoy short sensual stories?
WHAT!THE!HELLLLLLL!DUDE! That's what I get for wondering. I have a feeling he might ask me something else tomorrow. Stay tuned.
From: ignoreme (View Profile)
Subject: Hello Sent Date: 9/1/2009 3:37:51 PM
Hey how are you doing? Did you have a good weekend? Any big plans for the holiday weekend coming up?
I didn't respond... his picture was fine. I always check out the profile to see if there's something I'm missing.
Nope, nothing going on there. Plus, he's short. And he doesn't need to know what I'm doing for the weekend.
Something about the way I ignored the email made him wonder something very specific:
From: ichangedmyminddontignoreme (View Profile)
Subject: Hello Sent Date: 9/2/2009 7:30:14 AM
May i ask you a somewhat personal question?
Did I respond to this guy and forget? I'm pretty sure I didn't. But I'm sorta dying to know if he's going to be that guy and ask if the carpet matches the drapes. What else would he want to know that he needs to ask it that way? I mull it over and decide I'm irritated enough to need to know what he wants.
From: godwhatdoyouwantman (View Profile)
Subject: RE:Hello Sent Date: 9/2/2009 11:34:04 AM
if you really wanted to know, you would've just asked it already, right?
the real question is if i'll answer it.
From: yay!aresponse (View Profile)
Subject: RE:RE:Hello Sent Date: 9/2/2009 11:41:01 AM
LOL... do you ever enjoy short sensual stories?
WHAT!THE!HELLLLLLL!DUDE! That's what I get for wondering. I have a feeling he might ask me something else tomorrow. Stay tuned.
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